Uppalling

My evasive MP has dragged himself out of the Thames and onto the Commons benches to make a speech!

That's two in 3 months, which works out at £17,000 for the two.

So anyway, what did he have to say in his 200 words?

From my experience of the working of capital gains tax

Er… he claims to be a businessman, but won't say what his business is. I assume 'experience' means legally fiddling the books to pay the low rate of capital gains tax rather than the income tax rate that the rest of us pay.

and from speaking to constituents

I'd love to see his footnote on this. Presumably it means 'my Tory mates' and it clearly doesn't mean me. It may, in fact, be a lie. The Dark Place South-West is not Silicon Valley. Unemployment, manual labour and the NHS take most of its inhabitants, rather than thrusting entrepreneurial start-ups.

 it is a tax that is at the discretion of the individual investor. If prudent investors accrued a capital sum over a period of time, under the old system of indexation they would hold it for a long time and then realise the gains, often paying a minimal amount of capital gains tax. He will remember the 1970s, when CGT was very high and private investors would often ask "Why materialise this asset and pay the tax?" The 28% rate strikes a fair deal, and those of us on the Conservative Benches who come from a real business background understand and appreciate that a deal has to be struck with private investors and business.

And that's the entire speech. Here's my digested version:
'I'm a businessman. Like me, other businessmen like to evade paying their fair share to society. So you need to bribe me by making capital gains tax lower than the rates paid by the little people. If you don't, I'll hide my money and you can all sod off'.

Governments shouldn't be about 'striking deals' with anyone - it should be about the public good, transparency and fairness.

In case you think I'm being a little harsh on Uppal, take a look at the two speeches - both by Stephen Timms - prior to and immediately after Uppal's 'contribution'. They're long, detailed, technically knowledgeable, thoughtful and principled. All this, despite the fact that he was stabbed twice in the stomach by a deranged constituent in May and could be forgiven for taking a breather.

Paul Uppal: Tory Scum.