Thursday, 17 February 2011

Thursday conundrum

My grandmother is 98 at the weekend, and I'm stuck for a present. Last year's was, frankly, a disaster. Who knew that a skateboard was considered 'inappropriate'? She never got the hang of grinds though her lip tricks were coming on nicely until, well, let's not go into the 'until'.

So - your suggestions please?

Meanwhile, treat yourself to the sounds of Zoot Horn's guitar licks as part of Cruel Brother - now with Myspace and a producer.


Zoot Horn said...

Get her a telecaster, a Marshall amp and an effects pedal. My gran used to love hers.

Ewarwoowar said...

Get her a card, sign it with something like "Best wishes, HRH" and then convince her she's been asleep for 3 years.

The Plashing Vole said...

Good idea Zoot. Though I always thought of her as more of a bassist.

Ewar: that wouldn't be a hard sell. She doesn't know the names of her grandchildren but can still recognise the Simpsons. She has no idea how old she is.

Connie said...

For Christmas, about ten years ago, my ex asked his mother what he should get his ill grandmother for a present. His mother insisted that Nan would like a bed-jacket. We spent God knows how long trying to find a store that still stocked such a thing. Finally, by phone call, I found out that Beatties in Wolverhampton did.

We drove over to Wolves one evening to get this jacket. Being Beatties, it wasn't cheap; it was pink, kitsch and made out of that flammable material that so appeals to old people.

On Christmas day (we weren't there) Nan opened her presents with the help of my ex's mother. We were told she was particularly enamoured with her bri-nylon bed jacket. Unfortunately, less than ten hours later Nan was dead. This was, incidentally, due to cancer, not the excitement of the bed jacket.

As Nan had died, so wasn't in need of her Christmas gifts, these were all returned to senders for them to get refunds. Apart from the bed jacket. We were told that Nan was so taken by it that Richard's mother had decided she was going to be cremated in it. Let me again remind you- this was a Beatties bed jacket! But what can you say? What is good etiquette in such a situation?

My elderly Aunty Pearl, when she was still with us, always asked for toilet rolls and Bounty Bars for birthdays and Christmas.