It's a mere 4 weeks and a day since I e-mailed my new MP, Paul Uppal, to politely ask for a few biographical details.
Is he a safe-cracker, an orange-stuffer or a jellyfish-botherer? He could be, for all I know, because he doesn't answer nice letters from his own constituents. He probably isn't any of those things, but we just don't know.
I've never come across a politician with a 'no communications' communications strategy.
Perhaps he's dead. Has anyone else heard from him? He's only managed to vote four times, on the 7th and 8th June. His proud record: voting to make sure that nuclear weapons aren't discussed when budget cuts come round. Obviously, retaining the ability to kill civilians in their millions is far preferable to maintaining spending on school meals, the national health service or public libraries.
Is Paul Uppal working hard for Dark Place South West?
No speeches made - not even the initial 'maiden speech'
No written questions tabled
No select committees or parliamentary groups joined.
Maybe it's not just me. He could be dead! Or just very, very lazy.
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