Political Gladiators

Morning comrades. Or afternoon. Whatever.

The big debate here, or what would be the big debate had I seen or spoken to anyone so far this morning, is who won the party leaders' face-off last night. It's the first of three, this one being home affairs.

Did anyone watch it? Emma came round and we consumed (and I spilled) wine and pizza, while shouting obscenities at the television. I like to think we're ideal citizens.

Instant polling gave it to the Liberal Democrat leader, Nick Clegg, with Cameron leading Brown by a few points. Not the way I saw it: Brown's been the most unpopular prime minister in decades, presiding over an illegal war and economic collapse. It should have been an open goal for Cameron - and he missed. All three managed to spout their pre-prepared lines, but Brown managed to avoid his usual habit of listing reams of statistics and was even light-hearted now and then. We expect him to be largely dour and solid, and he was.

Cameron seemed to waver between weirdo American small state stuff, even weirder optimism and the most appalling fearmongering, spiced with anecdotes presumably added to make him look 'in touch'. Odd moments really exposed him, such as when he called for more drug rehabilitation, despite promising a smaller state and massive cuts in healthcare: who's going pay for it. Weirder still was his argument that we need bigger nuclear weapons in case of Iran and China: is he planning to declare war? He even edged close to saying 'some of my best friends are black'.He was dicy on state education too; kept mentioning that his kids go to state primary schools. If I were Brown, I'd have asked what his experience of state and mixed education was (Eton, currently £35,000 per year, all-male, all rich). And when he last went hunting.

Brown won't have lost any seats by this debate. Cameron may have. Clegg had it easy - he can range the philosophical prairie because he's not going to be in government. He'll pick up a few seats from this and be happy.

Next week it's the foreign affairs debate - I'd expect Clegg and Brown to score heavily here, given that Cameron's sweetness and light doesn't extend to foreigners.

Worst moments: Brown using 'less' instead of 'fewer', and David Cameron twice bringing up his dead child to prove that he loves the NHS. Brown had a child die too, and didn't sink that low.

Ewarwoowar live blogged the whole thing, wittily and largely accurately.

Update: oh look, Gary Barlow's a Tory (11.50 summary and 11.03). Who loses most credibility from that? Brown's been talking about the economy. Clegg's talking about nuclear weapons. Cameron and Barlow are talking about a national school talent show called 'School Stars'. What a dick, eh, readers?