Tuesday, 31 March 2009

All readers, please comment

I just helped out with a Digital Media lecture on social networking sites, which was fascinating. We talked about the various ways SNSs can be conceptualised, their relationship to the public sphere, and the notions of SNSs as loci for performativity.

So: please leave a note on this post (anonymously if you wish) saying whether I a) know you in person, b) consider yourselves my friend, acquaintance, colleague, stalker or other and c) whether you think there's any difference between being an online 'friend' and an offline/real-life friend. Just out of interest.

I realised during this lecture too how many SNSs of which I'm a member. While rejecting Facebook, I'm on three fencing forums including the main British Fencing one, Librarything, Flickr, Academia.edu and several others.

8 comments:

Ewarwoowar said...

a) Yes.

b) Acquaintance, colleague-ish, stalker.

c) Yes, definitely. Real friends are far more important and are to be cherished. Having an online friend is nice but I sometimes think that people just try and bag as many online friends as possible to make them look as popular as they can.

Dan said...

a) No (I know the above though.)

b) Just a reader.

c) Most definitely, hence my poor number of friends on Facebook. I always consider the implications and consequences when 'adding' someone. Will she think I fancy her, will she know I fancy her, do they remember me etc. One of the best comments I saw was one left on my mates page on which a girl wrote she enjoys speaking to him on Facebook but is to shy to speak to him in public.

Hope this helps.

Benjamin. said...

a. Yes.

b. Student/Lecturer.

c. Many SNSs are used to communicate with real life friends anyway however many choose to crazily add strangers which becomes an addiction.

Of course for students its more of a tempetation to distract oneself from assingnments hence my own blog posts which orginally was created to raise awareness of deafness and tinnitus.

Lauren said...

A) Erm I'm not sure. You don't know me, but may know my face as I am a student in intro to lit and you were my seminar leader last semester.

B) student/lecturer

c) Yes of course there is a difference, online friends you don't have to see if you don't want to and have maybe never even met them in person. Whereas real life friends you see day to day in person. Although most real life friends you can chat to online anyway, thanks to facebook etc..

Benjamin Judge said...

a) yes

b) You were one of my best men at my wedding. It wasn't that long ago so I thought you might remember! I consider you a particularly special friend to the point that if I were born a woman you might not be single (You wish. I would be way out of your league)

c) I don't think the two are mutually exclusive and a lot of it depends on how long you have known somebody, be it in 'real life' or on the internet. Currently most people have friends that they have known for years before they even had access to the internet. In time this will change so perhaps any obvious differences between the two are only relevant at present and within a decade will seem quaint.

One thing that I do find intriguing though is that Facebook and the like bind people to everyone they have ever known. To develop as a person it is as important to lose friends as it is to make new ones. Whereas in 'real life' it is relatively easy to just see less of someone who undermines/pressures/bullies you, on the internet you are making a public statement by removing them from a list of 'friends'. Ironically I suppose it is people we have known in 'reality' that are the most unwanted online.

Anonymous said...

I am clearly a stalker. Probably? Possibly?

I actually deleted my Facebook account a few weeks ago, and Facebook was trying to guilt trip me to keep the account active.
It said "Your 196 friends will miss you" then the pictures of a selection of them and "(insert name) will miss you".
Not only that, when it asked me why I wished to delete the account it asked why, I checked the "I don't find it useful" box, and it gave me advice. Yes. It said I should read the facebook quick guide for some tips on what Facebook has to offer!

Needless to say it didn't acheive the desired effect and in fact, spurred the deletion on.

So far I don't miss Facebook at all. I still talk to the real friends - even if I don't see them everyday I call them.
I think the reason I don't miss the Facebook friends is that vibrant, though provoking conversation was a rarity. The Facebook friends only make small talk so that when people snoop on their profile they look popular.

Or maybe I'm just making a sweeping assumption there?

Benjamin. said...

Perhaps correct with your assumption however popularity opens many doors. The more popular the person seems in his/her own delusion then the more confident that person will be at say job interviews even if they do not talk to their 'friends' outside the bedroom.

The same for my blog, the more attention my blog gets then hopefully the more journalistic interest therefore more awareness alongside article writing for the Hearing Times.

Hell, Im probably trying to get readers of this blog to look upon it in a twisted fashion without realising.

Thus the problem with the internet, it can become a way of thinking and thats not natural.

Hannah said...

a)yes

b)friend, long-term stalker

c)Nothing can replace having 'real' friends. I am on Facebook but I would probably only class about 10% of my Facebook 'friends' as close real-life friends. I find it bizarre that someone with whom you were at primary school well over 20 years ago (oh dear that does show my age), and who you have never seen or heard of since, would want to add you as a friend. Of those who claim to have hundreds of ‘friends’ on these social networking sites, I would ask this question- how many of them would be there for you when you really need them?- I suspect the answer would be not very many…or maybe I am just cynical.