Keep on Ripping

Do you drink Relentless? It's one of those horrible energy drinks. I've always thought that there's a dark undertow to the name: there aren't many positive actions to which the adjective is attached. Relentless warfare? Relentless struggle? Above all, relentless stalking, rapist or serial killer. It just screams Travis Bickle.

I'm vindicated by the world view of these people. Own-brand versions of products can't afford to sit round thinking of euphemisms - they need to appeal directly to potential purchasers, and so often cut through the marketing guff to the heart of the product's selling point.

Asda's versions are Monster and Ripper. Are these positive? Do they bring to mind images of students consuming the product while the revise through the night? Or DJs spinning discs for an ecstatic, demanding public? Not to me they don't. They remind me of CIA torturers in Guantanamo Bay taking a break from extreme manicure, Ted Bundy, Jack the Ripper and the Yorkshire Ripper. It's always possible that 'Ripper' signifies a return to Enid Blyton's world of lashings of ginger beer and 'ripping' picnics - but it's rather a stretch.

Energy drinks - unleash your hidden rapist.