Tuesday, 14 September 2010

Klever Keystone Kops

Like every other public agency, the police are lobbying and spinning as hard as they can to resist budget cuts(the government resists by spinning worse cuts than they'll actually implement, to soften us up).

Unlike many others, the cops have come up with a brilliant line:
Everyone's going to be on the streets protesting your other budget cuts. If you cut our funding, there won't be enough of us to stop them marching on Downing Street and stringing you up from the lampposts.

I paraphrase, but that's basically the gist of it.

"In an environment of cuts across the wider public sector, we face a period where disaffection, social and industrial tensions may well rise," says Barnett in his draft speech to the annual police superintendents' conference, which takes place in Cheshire.
"We will require a strong, confident, properly trained and equipped police service, one in which morale is high and one that believes it is valued by the government and public."

'It's the lads, sarge. They want to crack lefty heads, but they're worried about their jobs. Knuckledusters cost money, y'know'.

 Got to admire that level of cunning!


Anonymous said...

Yes, because it is a proven fact that during times of economic hardship crime rates plummet.

neal said...

Yep, exactly what I thought when I read it. A pretty obvious line of argument but it'll probably work.

The Plashing Vole said...

Interestingly, this is the first recession in which crime rates have continued to fall. Why this is the case, I'm not sure. It may be that virtually everyone has the desirable consumer goods, and they're so cheap that thieving them is no longer economically worthwhile. Or perhaps people are getting nicer!