Showing posts with label Lord of the Rings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lord of the Rings. Show all posts

Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Won't somebody think of the children?

Don't take your kids to the new Muppets movie. Despite it being a Hollywood production replete with the inevitable corporate tie-ins, Fox News has announced that it's eco-communist propaganda:

"Liberal Hollywood depicting a successful businessman as evil – that's not new," said Bolling. He asked his guest, media-bias alarmist Dan Gainor, if Hollywood was deliberately trying to brainwash kids.
"Absolutely," said Gainor. "And they've been doing it for decades." He pointed out that oil could be used to "light a hospital" or "fuel an ambulance". "They don't want to tell that story," he said.
Bolling's Fox News colleague Andrea Tantaros chimed in, saying: "I just wish liberals could leave little kids alone." Bolling wondered aloud why the Muppets couldn't, for once, "have the evil person be the Obama administration". It only remained for him to throw up his hands and cry: "Where are we? Communist China?"

Which compared with Jeremy Clarkson, is small beer indeed. And more to the point: what children's literature isn't subversive? All the good stuff, at least. The Phantom Tollbooth is, for me, a Derridean deconstruction of language and signifier. Goldilocks crosses the animal human divide, while even the dumbest pubescent girl will spot the barely-hidden sexual messages of Red Riding Hood. Hell, even Bugs Bunny's eternal tormenting of Elmer Fudd is a clear attack on the armed rapaciousness of Big Farmer and the hunting fraternity.

Virtually every kids' book ever written preaches the joys of sharing and the misery attendant on being a selfish bully. Whenever I meet a Tory or a banker, I have to assume that they read only the nasty stuff: Narnia and The Lord of the Rings, both of which promote greed, racism and individualism in the service of a cruel and vengeful god, and in which the daily toil of the ordinary person is utterly insignificant.

Like this bit, the smashing of Isengard by angry trees.



Apparently if you're an industrial worker, you're a despicable, degraded monster deserving a cruel death, not empathy or advice from a friendly trades unionist. You don't get a name, or agency. You're just a Morlock in the blind service of evil. You hate trees and the trees are going to kill you, rightfully so. For Tolkien, apparently, being working-class means you have no culture, no rights and no future. The world - as all the positive characters keep saying - is descending into darkness, and the victory over Sauron is really only the last hurrah of the ancient and (don't forget), racially pure. Miscegenation is a cause for sadness (when it's 'good' races like Elves and the better sort of men), and for evil when it's the lower orders.

This is what really bothers me about Tolkien and Narnia: the idea that there is no progress, only decay. That racial purity and wisdom are automatically linked. That the darker your skin or the more X chromosomes you have, the dumber and more passive you should be. Who could fail to be revolted by the way Susan is excluded from Narnia for developing an interest in lipstick and boys? Or the way the children die horribly in a train wreck, with the words 'school is over. The holidays have begun', as though life on earth is no more meaningful than sitting in the waiting room?

Now run along before Gandalf rips off your face, peasants. And read Alison Lurie's Don't Tell The Grown-ups.

Friday, 24 April 2009

Speakers turned up to 11

While the office is empty, I can listen to whatever I want. Yesterday it was grimy, lovely Straight Edge. Today it's Dvorak's Requiem Mass while I prepare for my 19th-century literature class. It's an astonishing, powerful, heart-rending piece. No cheesy major-minor slide is missed in his quest for raw emotion. Even better, Dvorak was an atheist and wrote the Mass after he slagged off church music to a bishop - who challenged him to write something better.

For the nerds amongst you (for such there be), the music accompanying the death of Gandalf in one of the Lord of the Rings episodes (when his comrades burst out of the mines of Moria) is 'highly influenced' by sections of the Dvorak.

Monday, 6 April 2009

A literary question

What book has changed your life? What one book should people read? What one book shouldn't anyone read. I tried these questions on my first-year students and discovered that nobody likes 19th-century novels any more.

My answers:
Changed my life: Walden by Henry David Thoreau.
Book everyone should read: more tricky - so many good ones, so many for particular reasons. The Communist Manifesto? The Wind in the Willows? The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?
Don't touch with a bargepole: The Lord of the Rings. Atlas Shrugged. The Book of Mormon. Left Behind. Any of Dickens' 'funny' novels. The Narnia novels. Loads more…