Culture alert

It's November and my choice on The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple. I've proposed some reading (Kate Roberts's wonderful Feet in Chains, originally Traed Mewn Cyffion) and a creative task - responses to autumn, because I want to kick piles of leaves over.

By the way, does the phrase 'there are pockets of excellence' mean that there's a lot of very poor work done? I can't help thinking that it does. Insulting…

What a long, strange weekend it's been

How was your weekend? Mine was pretty action-packed.

On Friday, Mark, Neal Emma and I tucked into the Mussaman curry which was this month's Culture, Cheese and Pineapple experience. It was vegetarian (squashes instead of meat) in deference to Emma and Mark, and Neal did all the cooking. It was a revelation - coconut, tamarind, lime leaves and all sorts of other goodnesses combined to produce food heaven, so thanks Neal. We washed it all down with an excellent array of real ales, and Emma provided horrendously chocolaty puddings.

Then Saturday saw the British Fencing Annual General Meeting in Telford. Most impressively, a sport of 10,000 participants managed to see 23 people turn up at the AGM, most of whom were directors or bigwigs of some sort. I managed to ask a couple of awkward questions, a rule change was pushed through enabling the board to change any bye-laws without consultation, and we sat through presentations about the future of fencing: basically, let's grab as much cash as is going, professionalise the structures and produce recreational and medal-winning fencers. I know this doesn't sound too revolutionary, but the buffers don't like it, perhaps put off by the inevitably management-speak it was all dressed up in. I'm quite keen though: it's time my sports wasn't solely associated with posh schools and the aristocracy - it isn't in other countries.

Finally, Neal, Emma and I went to Birmingham for the Arts Festival. We enjoyed Brawd (blokes with guitars), the Music Maze (participatory sessions) run by Birmingham Contemporary Music Group (Emma declined to bang things, but Neal and I had a ball) and foaming pints of real ale. We played on the BBC's science toys (Bang Goes The Theory) and mooched around the art stuff in the Town Hall. The only down side was the absence of the hot girls with books Neal had spotted the day before.

Until Monday, Farewell!

Further to The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple, Neal's cooking a Mussaman curry for Emma, Mark and I tonight. Then tomorrow it's Ho! for the British Fencing AGM. I couldn't face dinner with the buffers, but I'll turn up for the business and the mini-conference, hand over my UKSG welfare report and go home, hopefully unentangled by the politics. Ho ho ho.

Have a good weekend.

Another day, another present

This morning, Ben (with stunning generosity), has sent Jane's Addiction's Ritual de lo Habitual. I think I see what he's up to with this, the Pantera and the Faith No More. He thinks I listen solely to fey, twee indiepop and need TOUGHENING UP!

Actually though, I loved this album when I was a young man and in my prime, so I'm very happy to have it again. This morning I started with the Sufjan Stevens cover of 'O Holy Night' from the sometimes overblown Songs for Christmas, then the Salvation Army Choir's rendition, then straight into Fucking Hostile (Pantera) and now I'm listening to Stockhausen, so it's an eclectic day already. I've dealt with a lost and confused student and done another 60 lengths in the pool, so I've sort of achieved things.

How are you getting on with The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple? My choice is coming up soon, and it's a humdinger.

Andrew Marr and Karlheinz Stockhausen - separated at birth? Marr does sort of conduct while interviewing, with his crazy long arms.

The birthday that keeps on giving

I'm almost 34 and one month old, yet gifts keep arriving.

Cynical Ben, my partner in crime on The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple - now open - has sent me presents which seem to form part of an attempt to toughen me up. Jenn Ashworth's A Kind of Intimacy, in which a fat stalker gets obsessed with the neighbour, leading to 'a bloody climax' (Ben likes it), Faith No More's Angel Dust, and Pantera's Vulgar Display of Power, to which I haven't listened since I was 16, except for 'Walk'. Cool!

I think that's enough from me for today. I'm away tomorrow, meeting my old friend (the friendship's old, not the friend) Victoria in Chester tomorrow for lunch, gossip and - inevitably - bookhunting. Au revoir

Hurry on down…

…not the excellent John Wain novel, but a reminder that The Culture Cheese and Pineapple launches in a few days: sign up now!

Nun better

Laura's been in: more lovely presents, along the theme of The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple (which you're all joining, aren't you?). As well as a copy of John Burrow's wonderful A History of Histories, she gave me some miniature Marmite-flavoured cheeses, a French Scrabble birthday card, a tin of pineapple chunks and, in honour of my school days, miniature Nun Bowling, with nun-shaped skittles. These will be making an appearance in the pub later. Thanks!

All aboard the effete train

Cynical Ben and I are on the verge of starting our sort-of culture/book/stuff online club: The Culture, Cheese and Pineapple! Thanks to Ben for sorting it out. We'll get going before long, so sign up for excitement, adventure and really wild things, as Arthur Dent is promised, much to his horror.