Tuesday 31 May 2011

Jung at heart; or, Psychobabble corner

Over on Sue's blog, she suggests taking the Myers-Briggs personality test to cure boredom. Very interesting results, though because I can see how the questions relate to each other and what they're after, it's impossible to get an objective set of answers.

But I did my best, and it's not promising given my chosen career.

Your Type is 
INTJ
IntrovertedIntuitiveThinkingJudging
Strength of the preferences %
56
  75178
You are:
  • moderately expressed introvert
  • distinctively expressed intuitive personality
  • slightly expressed thinking personality
  • very expressed judging personality

A 1 for 'thinking'. That's where it's all gone wrong. Perhaps I scored so low on that and so high on 'Judging' because I've been marking essays for weeks. No thinking involved, but an awful lot of judging people (hence the calls and e-mails flowing in today).

So, what does INTJ mean? Well, it means I'm not cut out to be a teacher. I'm a MASTERMIND!
Masterminds are rare, comprising no more than one to two percent of the population, and they are rarely encountered outside their office, factory, school, or laboratory. Although they are highly capable leaders, Masterminds are not at all eager to take command, preferring to stay in the background until others demonstrate their inability to lead.
Masterminds do not feel bound by established rules and procedures, and traditional authority does not impress them, nor do slogans or catchwords. Only ideas that make sense to them are adopted; those that don't, aren't, no matter who thought of them. Remember, their aim is always maximum efficiency. 
Masterminds tend to be much more definite and self-confident than other Rationals, having usually developed a very strong will. Decisions come easily to them; in fact, they can hardly rest until they have things settled and decided. But before they decide anything, they must do the research. Masterminds are highly theoretical, but they insist on looking at all available data before they embrace an idea, and they are suspicious of any statement that is based on shoddy research, or that is not checked against reality. 
Yeah, screw The Man! Actually, I'm getting a strong whiff of psychopath about this. All these qualities would apply rather well to international terrorists, dictators and the like. You know I occasionally mention that most of you belong in camps? Looks like I've got all the skills required to make sure you actually end up there…

Famous INTJ types?

Oh dear. The nerd quotient, I can take. But Ayn Rand: a fascist fraud? Say it ain't so! That list looks deeply suspicious to me. Apart from the fact that even the living ones are unlikely to have taken the test or made it available to some web-based charlatans, it's got a whiff of positivity about it. OK, Rand's the thinking person's nightmare, but lots of Americans think she belongs in the Pantheon. The others are largely unexceptional or even positive role models. I doubt, somehow, that the monsters appear on anyone's results ("People like you: Pol Pot"). So what jobs can I do?
They are often led into technical positions such as scientific researcher, design engineer, environmental planner. The developing field of genetics benefits from their intensity as does the field of medicine. In education they are most often found at the college and university level. In the professions, they may be a lawyer, a business analyst, or strategic planner. Some have a strong artistic/creative bent and may become an artist, inventor, or designer. 

It's OK. This stuff is obviously total bollocks designed to get me to buy (or buy into) something. I can relax into my lazy and inefficient ways safe in the knowledge that nobody's expecting me to either revolutionise physics or make billions. And you can rest easy in your beds… Or can you?

9 comments:

ed said...

I'm posting this here because the post to which this comment refers to is too far down now for you to notice it and I wanted to make sure that you received my thanks for making me aware of the following piece of information:

New Shonen Knife album? Excellent!

The Plashing Vole said...

All part of the service.
They have been long rambling posts today.

Ewarwoowar said...

I got 78% introverted which wasn't really a surprise but still depressed me.

Two US Presidents were like me though so that's cool.

Dan said...

Ah, personality tests - so beloved of recruitment consultants and the like. What a complete crock of cack.

I once applied for a job with B&Q, and as part of the online application process you had to complete one of these tests (which in itself took what seemed like a week). I tried to answer questions in a way that would cast me in a good light - i.e. kind, helpful and generally nice - but in the test results generated was told I didn't quite have the sort of personality they were probably looking for.

So either B&Q actively seek to employ arrogant, loud-mouthed wideboys. Or these tests are utter shit.

Not that it has to be 'either / or' of course...

Dan said...

I should point out that when I recently applied for another job with B&Q they had abandoned the personality tests (which had previously been 'provided' for them by some hot air filled consultancy company). So they had obviously realised the tests were a waste of time. Or they'd looked at their receipts.

Anonymous said...

Oh bum, I've reached the ripe old age of 59 and now I find out that I should be a social worker! Must be my caring nature....

The Red Witch said...

Maybe I've been raised on teen magazines for girls and Cosmo, I love personality tests. My results are always so flattering to me. :-)

The Plashing Vole said...

Dan: very funny. Clearly they are looking for weirdos.

What would magazines do without this crap. So come on, Red Witch, share!

The Red Witch said...

O alright. Depending on the day, I'm an I or an E, 49-51 or 51-49. The rest is NTP.